One thing I have learnt in life is that no matter what life serves us with, we always have a binary choice of either taking things in stride, accepting them as the ebb and flow of life or being downright bitter.
I know many people who had every reason to be bitter about life, God and generally everything and everyone around them. Looking at their plight, you would really forgive them for feeling hard done by life. Yet, instead of succumbing to defeat and bitterness, they have such a positive disposition of life you will swear they are oblivious to their current unlucky set of circumstances. They had a choice of resenting their circumstances. They elected not to.
The thing with bitterness is that it makes us feel justified in our actions, even if such actions are self-destructive. It sets us on an entitlement mode as we feel like God, life, our parents or anyone owes us an apology. We feel we have the right to feel the way we do since we were victimized by life or by people around us. After all, we are the ones who were hurt profusely, betrayed, rejected or vandalized. We are the ones who have suffered a litany of inexplicable misfortunes. We are the ones contending with the mysterious sickness and the acute cruxifying pain that comes with it. We are the ones who know just how much of a not-so-easy life we have had.
The Bible records the parable of a man who goes on a journey but before he leaves he gives five bags of gold to one servant, two to another and one to a third. When he comes back, the one who had received five bags of gold had doubled the investment. The one who had received two bags of gold doubled the investment he had received. Both of these were praised. But then the one who had received one bag of gold said he had been too afraid to invest his bag of gold. He buried his bag of gold to keep it safe and returned it without any gain.
This parable is a classic example of how we react differently as human beings. The two servants decided to make the best of what they were given by their master. The third servant, instead of doing the same, looked for excuse of not doing something with what was given to him.
The trick to enjoying life is making the most of what you have been given. Just like the servants in the parable were given different amounts of bags, we also find ourselves in different set of circumstances. Now for most of us, instead of doing the most with what we have been given, we settle for excuses. Most of those have the undertones of bitterness. We feel justified in being discontented, unhappy and bitter because of what life has thrown at us. As a result, most people live life from the premise of “what it ought to be” and not “what is” and make the most of it. We become pre-occupied with where “we ought to be”, rather than “where we are”, and miss revelling in the moment. Furthermore, some of the experiences we have been through have distorted our perspective of what life ought to be.
No matter where you are in life, no matter your circumstances, you can still be happy. It is a choice. If you continuously compare your life to that of others, chances of you being happy are zero. Each of us have been given the number of bags proportionate to our destiny.
Stop blaming God or people for your circumstances. Instead, understand that your path has been carved differently or even uniquely. Your bag is different for a divine purpose. We need to let go of the life we “ought to have” and embrace the one GOD has allowed us to have.
Also, the mistake we often make is judging life by the standard of our past or current circumstances. Those circumstances can be misleading. they paint the narrative that things will always be like this.
Often it becomes easier to complain and blame others than to do something. Bitterness has a way of making us live in a state of inertia where instead of doing something, we find a reason to be inactive. Many people’s gifts, talents and capabilites are hidden behind a myriad of excuses.
Also, too many people are pre-occupied with starring at other people’s bags such that they will never discover what was the true contents of the bag(s) they were given by God. Some are bitter that God gave others five bags, when they were only given one, not realising that just that one bag was actually meant to produce a million other bags.
Happiness is a choice. Wallowing in a pool of bitterness is also a choice. We can either be bitter and blame God or make the most of what we have currently. It is all up to us.
